Fastest. Shower. Ever.
I’m known for my fast showers but this beats any time yet! I go to the gym right after work so today I got home at about 5 and instead of taking a shower right away, I got distracted by email. Well, then someone rings the buzzer ten minutes later and it’s the water company and they are turning off the water because of an emergency and are telling me if I need water, I better hurry up and get it now. I stood by the door panic stricken and talked into the intercom, “How much time do I have?” He said he didn’t know, just as soon as he had alerted every resident he was going to turn it off.
People…let me tell you this. I only wish I had time to turn on a stop watch because that was the fastest shower hands down I will ever take. It must have been less than two minutes-soap (of course!) shampoo and conditioner and my hair is long. Problem is, as soon as I stepped out, I noticed I’d left my apartment door ajar (yes, yes I know…not exactly the best thing to do when you’re taking a shower with the bathroom door wide open but I didn’t have time to close it; it may have ruined my world record). So, unfortunately my cat Spooky had gotten out and was meandering the stairwell yowling his head off. See, my upstairs neighbors adopted a dog recently and I think that set my poor cat off a bit. Problem is, well, I’m just standing there in my towel calling to him and cannot for the life of me get him to come down. (It’s not as bad as it sounds, people. I mean, if you subscribe to the Douglas Adams philosophy, one should never be without her or his towel when treveling the universe.) So I throw on a sweater and a skirt and run up the stairwell but by that time, he’s been yowling by their door for at least five minutes like he’s in some weird PTSD trance. (Totally unrelated but skirts should be given more props because of incidents just like this. It would have taken me at least thirty seconds longer to put on a pair of pants. Skirts are teh best Seriously. Maybe it’s a phase I’m going through but skirts are great.)
Back to my point…I’m sure my neighbors must totally hate me now. And I also have a rather sinking suspicion that this is exactly how women with cats get known as being crazy cat ladies when really we’re just totally unorganized, half-hazard and really idiosyncratically good at doing rather meaningless things. Yes, there is a difference. Anyhow, after the laundry debacle and the incessant playing of Inara George I am sure I am hereby out of their good graces. Ah well. At least I got a shower. And I even feel clean No, really. It’s a skill people, a skill. Don’t even tell me you aren’t impressed okay? Because, you know if you do I’ll just cry. I’d be careful about that because the last thing you ever want to do is make some crazy catwoman cry, right? Did I just admit to that now?
(corrects self, clears throat, speaks up) I meant half-hazard quick shower taking cat woman. To you anyways.
(now playing: Calla: Collisions-like a lush shoegazy starflyer 59 album…that’s the best way I can think to describe this)